No Lie
by KitKat213
Summary: Usopp is stuck with the night shift and he created a Lie detector, He wakes up Luffy and asks him some interesting question. LuNa! warning: this story is a one shot unless you demand more chapters. Read and Review peeps!
1. Chapter 1: night shift

**a/n: soo, this is what happens when im bored...hope some of ya'll will enjoy! **

**No Lie**

**By: MEEEE! :3**

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**~~~Usopp's Pov~~~**

It was dark, obviously, it was night-time and I was on night shift.

"Dammit, SO BORED!" I yelled, as I fiddled with some stuff I had before me,

I'm trying to make a Human Lie Detector, I'm pretty much done...but I need someone to try it on... I walked into the men's room and stood there, Hmm...who should it be...

"Zolo? Nah, I bet all he thinks about is booze...Sanji? Nope...I don't wanna know about what he thinks about Nami and Robin...Chopper? no, he has nothing to hide from me...so that leaves..." I whisper as I scan the room,

"...Luffy!" I exclaim a bit to loudly, The rubber boy raises his head from his hammock when he heard his name being called.

"hmm? who said that? was it the Easter bunny? if it was...then go away cuz I don't like cows..." He mumbled, Half asleep.

Easter Bunny? Cows? this could be more interesting than I thought...

"Luffy, its me, Captain Usopp. Wake up!" I say as I poke Luffy's arm, no response...I reach out and grab his precious Straw-hat, and I turn to walk away,

"DON'T TOUCH MAH HAT YOU CHOCOLATE PANDA BASTARD!" Luffy yells as he stretches his arm and punches me in the face, I hit the ground and dropped what I had stolen. Luffy stumbles over and picks up his hat and puts it on his head, then he stumbles back to his hammock and goes back to sleep.

"Luffy! wake up!" No response "I have some meat..." I whisper and Luffy shoots up,

"MEAT?! GIVE ME MEAT!" Luffy yells, huh, typical Luffy.

"Luffy, I'm not giving you anymore food...now shut up and go to sleep." Sanji mumbles, Zolo mutters something I didn't quiet catch, but they both went back to sleep. I signal Luffy over and he trots over and we walk outside.

"so, where's the meat?" he asks me,

"I made that up...but I have a Lie detector, and I, Captain Usopp, have chosen you to be the first to try it." I explain, Luffy pouts but then agrees with a big smile.

"ok, I'm going to ask you some questions and you answer them, it doesn't matter if you lie." I tell him and he nods excitedly

"K, first question, do you...uh...dislike learning?" I ask, Luffy nods in agreement and I look at the device...hmm, I guess he was telling the truth...

"do you...steal meat at night?" I ask, half knowing the answer,

"no..." He replies after a bit, I look at the Lie detector...

"_THAT'S BULL- SHIT_." A mechanical voice says, making Luffy smile sheepishly. I let out a small laugh and Luffy stares at his feet.

"hehe, next question, whats your favorite color?" I said lamely,

"BLUE!" he said finally after a bit of thinking.

"_THAT'S A LOAD OF SHIT, YOU PANSY_." The voice responded, Luffy's face turned red...but not with embarrassment, but from anger.

"YOU TAKE THAT BACK YOU STUPID MACHINE!" Luffy yelled as he swiped at it, I quickly snatched at away and held it up to my chest protectively.

"Luffy! calm down! just answer the question again, whats your favorite color." I ask again,

"...its...orange." He says plainly.

"Why?" I ask, a bit curious about why the detected didn't go off again.

"...because it reminds me of Nami..." He squeaks, I look at him in shock, then I look at the detector...wait...WHY ISN'T IT GOING OFF?!

"last question...who do you like?" I ask, Dying to know if Luffy was lying or if the detector was broken.

"...no one.." He says firmly, yet...nervously? I was right...this is getting interesting...

"_BULL-SHIT! I CALL BULL-SHIT!_" The device yells, louder than before...no...this isn't possible, this isn't the Luffy I know...now, who could it be?

"Luffy..."

"...yes?..."

"who do you like?..." I ask nervously, My eyes glued to the Lie detector.

"...nami..." He whispers, just loud enough for me to hear. I stare at the device, hoping that it would go off and shout weird, rude shit. I waited...it didn't say anything...

"Maybe you're not saying it loud enough..." I suggest and Luffy's face goes red,

"...I...L-like...Nami" Luffy said, louder this time. I look at him and then back at the lie detector, once again, its silent.

"Luffy, are you being for real?" I ask. Luffy nods sheepishly,

"yes Usopp, now that I think about it...I feel better now!" He says with a huge smile. I cant imagine what he's gonna do now...

"IM GONNA TELL EVERYONE!" Luffy yells happily, Yawning a bit at the end, I look around and realize that it was almost dawn.

"well, they should wake up soon..." I say, still a bit shocked.

"yeah! let's wake 'em up Usopp!" Luffy says as he begins to run around screaming,

"HEY GUYS! WAKE UP! COME ON GUYS!" we yelled, running around like idiots, flapping our arms majestically like chickens.

"Oi! whats all the noise?" Zoro growls as he walks into the deck, followed by Nami, Chopper and Robin.

"great! we are all here! wait...were's Sanji?" I ask, looking around.

"right here! did you miss me Nami~!?" he asks, Luffy frowned and muttered something.

"Luffy has something to tell you, I didn't believe him at first...but trust me, he's not lying." I tell the crew.

"I LIKE NAMI! IN FACT, I LOVE HER!" Luffy yells out, as if he couldn't hold the secret any longer.

The others stand there, completely shocked, except robin and Zoro, Robin of course already knew and Zoro just didn't give a damn.

"just lettin' yah know!" Luffy smiles,

"IM CONFUSED!" Chopper exclaims, running around frantically, extremely grossed out by the word 'Love'.

ANYWAY, ITS BREAKFAST TIME!" Luffy calls out to Sanji, The others snap out of shock and slowly walk to the kitchen it silence. I turn to the kitchen...wait, were's Luffy? He should be in the kitchen, but I don't hear Sanji ranting about how much Luffy eats...

I turn around and see Luffy standing in front of Nami, who was still completely frozen in shock. Luffy was waving his hand in front of her face, trying to get a reaction, but Nami just stood there. after a bit Nami moves and faces the captain, she lifts her arm, Luffy flinches, expecting Nami to punch him but Nami retracts her arm and does something I never expected...she leaned in and kissed Luffy...but not on the cheek...IN THE MOUTH! Luffy's face lights up and returns the kiss joyfully.

"so...I guess your a couple now..." I say, both of them turn to face me, completely unaware that I was there.

"yep!" Luffy says, earning a blush from Nami,

"got a problem with it? take it up with my fist" Nami says menacingly, holding up her punching fist.

"n..no Nami...I don't have a problem with it...in fact, I, captain Usopp knew all along!" I say, proud that I didn't wet my pants at what Nami had said.

"that's nice~! now, it's breakfast time!" Nami said happily and she walked to the kitchen, Luffy quickly joined her.

wow...what a day...

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**A/N: I KNOW! SUCH A CRAPPY ENDING _! ANYWAY...review if you want...I might make more if you guys want...IMMA GO DO RANDOM STUFFS NOW! BAI BAI**

**-KitKat the very immature person.**


	2. Chapter 2: storks and lunch

**A/N: DAMN! this story got almost as much views as my other story 'accidentally in love' which has 8 chaps... that's nice xD! anyway, this is gonna be a short chap, if I like it and you guys like it, I'll make another chapter! Kk!**

**Chapter 2**

**[Insert creative title here]**

**~~~Zolo's Pov~~~**

I entered the kitchen and plopped down on my chair. I wasn't to pleased about being awakened so early for such a stupid reason like Luffy announcing his love to that witch of a navigator, Nami. I mean, do you think I wake up looking this good? well, I do...but someone as bad-ass like _me_ needs sleep.

"oi, Shit-cook, whats for breakfast?" I muttered, leaning back in my chair and I tried to fall asleep. Sanji placed some plates of food down on the table, it was soup.

"Soup! I love soup!" Luffy said happily as he walked into the kitchen with Nami right by his side, a broad smile on the two.

Chopper signaled Luffy over to sit next to him, as he always does. The captain shacked his head 'no' and instead he sat next to Nami, leaving a very disappointed Chopper behind.

"Luffy, dont you know that its Bro's before Hoe's?" I grumbled, Chopper got enough courage to nod his head in agreement. Nami glared at me, but it was Sanji who was the first to act,

"SHITTY MARIMO! HOW DARE YOU CALL NAMI A HOE!?" Sanji yelled, I grabbed my swords and blocked all of his kicks. Luffy sat there, upset that he didn't get his food and confused on why they where mad.

"Sanji! stop fighting and give me FOOOD!" Luffy ordered, Nami handed him a cookie the cook had brought her earlier, Luffy thanked her with a kiss.

"Hey, why was Sanji mad when Zolo called Nami a 'hoe'?" Luffy & Chopper asked, They looked at me with big innocent eyes..._fuck_...

"...um because...you see-"

"I mean, why would he be mad if you called her a gardening thingy?" Luffy interrupted, Nami stiffed a giggle...just go along with it...

I shrugged, Usopp looked at me as if I was stupid for agreeing. Oh shit, he's going to say what it really mean! I give the sharpshooter a death stare, and...he didn't see it, I'm dead shit...

"Luffy, what Zolo meant was that Nami was a hoe; a woman who sleeps with several men, in other words...a slut." Usopp said, I swear...why is he even in this crew? Luffy had a dramatically shocked face, then he glared me, anger burned in his eyes.

"Luffy, LUFFY! DON'T KILL ME!" I yelled, falling backwards in my chair when I saw Luffy's fist fly towards me. It missed, but only by a bit, I coward behind the fallen chair,

...uh...Ahem...Luffy, that was a figure of speech." I growled at him, all eyes where on me, a smile formed on their faces when they saw that I was still crouched behind the chair in fear.

"oh...OK! SANJI! FOOOOOD!" Luffy yelled, holding up his fork and knife happily. I rolled my eyes as I sat on my chair again, propping up my feat in the table.

"Oi! Marimo, feet off!" Sanji orders, shoving my feat off. Choppers tiny ears pricked up, sensing that we're about to fight,

"Hey, Usopp! what happened to the machine thingy you made?" The tiny reindeer asked, Sanji turned to face him. A scowled formed on his face as Chopper had reminded him off the thing that had brought Luffy and his precious Nami together.

"oh yeah! you mean my 'super mega Usopp machine 5000'?" Usopp says, holding his dumb invention proudly in the air. Chopper and Luffy's eyes turn to sparkles,

"CAN I SEE IT! PLEASE USOPP!" Chopper squealed, doing his puppy dog eyes, not that he needs it.

"ok! calm down Chopper! here ya go!" Usopp said, tossing the doctor the device. Chopper looked around mischievously, his eyes landed on Sanji,

"Sanji! have you ever kissed a girl? on the lips?" the reindeer asked, he tried his best not to run around in disgust.

"of course!" Sanji replied confidently, puffing out his chest proudly. Chopper looked at the device in his hooves, it went off immediately,

"_BULL-SHIT, I CALL B-S!_" The machine shouted, everyone giggled, but I laughed because im a bad ass. Sanji stared at the floor and his face was red with embarrassment.

"'THE SUPER MEGA USOPP MACHINE 5000' REALLY WORKS! THIS IS SOOO COOOL!" Chopper squealed in delight. Choppers eyes sparkled and he looked around the room for more potential victims.

"Robin!" He said after a bit of staring creepily at everyone. Robin smiled at the furry reindeer as he began to think of a good question, his face lights up and he looks up at Robin.

"Robin, do baby's really come from storks?" he asks with big innocent yet curious eyes, the room goes dead silent and Robin's always calm face was pale and her blue eyes open wide.

"...uh, Cook-San, why dont you explain this to Chopper~? I'm not feeling so well right now, I think I need to go rest." Robin lied and she slipped out of the kitchen and to the girls room. Sanji agreed before she left and he stood up and cleared his throat.

**x~X~x~X~x**

"and that were baby's come from!" Sanji announced after an hour of him explaining...how does he know all this? I glance at Chopper, Usopp and Luffy, their eyes where open wide and their mouths dropped open. Luffy looked at Nami and scooted away and sat next to Chopper.

"YOU IDIOT! WHY DID YOU TELL THEM?!" Nami yelled as she punched Sanji on the head, He was knocked out cold so Nami didn't get a response. Luffy smiled and sat back next to Nami.

"hehe! im just kidding Nami!" Luffy said happily, he leaned over and kissed Nami, once again Chopper ran around the table with his eyes closed and he began to knock some dishes down,

"Luffy...Nami...why dont you get a room?" I said, a small smile flashed across my face.

"maybe we will!" Nami said, raising an eyebrow and sticking her tongue out. Luffy smiled as he remembered his new-found knowledge, Chopper looked up at me,

" LITTLE BABY PIRATES!" Chopper and I yelled happily, Luffy and Nami blushed and Chopper smiled even bigger. "IM GOING TO BE AND UNCLE!' He exclaimed happily, I gave a small laugh and I ruffled his fur. This is going to be an interesting week!

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**A/N: yay! now I guess I have to make a chap 3...I FELL IN LOVE WITH THIS STORY! x3 well, favorite, follow ad Review to tell me what I could do, I can make more parings (no O.C's though) so yeah! REVIEW PEOPLE! xDDD**

**-KitKat the purple cherry with a top-hat.**


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